Replying to a comment on:

The cat who would fly (Free verse) by nentwined

Tearing the paper of my face, otherwise so placid--thoughts of a past that's not yet happened; where my kitten frolics, just a memory of this frail thing in front of me; she coughs and pushes towards me, threading her claws through the air; life and death really are this simple.

Jill Stockinger 15-Jan-07/8:05 PM
parts too unclear,
i liked the last 3 lines-

with paper of my face- don't use a metaphor if you won't develop it or DId you mean Off my face, as Dovina asked--




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001