Replying to a comment on:

I Have, Because I Am (Free verse) by flock

I have walked for twelve days straight With a sprained ankle. At the time, I carried 18 kg on my back and I was struck by heat exhaustion and diarrhea. I have clung to the side of a mountain, Hoping that a small clump of grass, Which kept me from falling 400m to my death, Did not break and thus spell out my demise. I have crept along a 800m-high precipice, Wondering if I should carry on to the top and Risk falling at any moment. What a wonderful view I saw from the top though. I have jumped across a crevice, and in doing so, Saw how close I was from meeting my fate. I have seen others do likewise And felt their relief as well. I have crawled in the dirt many times, Hoping that I could escape what had befallen me. I have stood on mountain-tops and Looked out as far as I could in every direction. I have looked over three mountain ranges to see the horizon, But saw only a vague haze. I have watched clouds gather and Fall like a thunderous cough onto a dry earth. I have seen birds build nests. I have seen plants grow Between small cracks in the rock. I have watched ants wake up and Start a new day of hard work, On a sunday. I have heard ants chewing on wheat stalks. I have seen a spider weave a web with Skill and intent unrivalled by any human. I have heard the birds waking at dawn. I have watched the moon fall into the sea. Twice. I have looked up at the stars. The very same stars that Explorers before me have used to navigate the seas. I have navigated through A mountain shrouded in mist. I have seen human traits in animals. I have seen animals in some humans. I have seen someone hate another. I have seen another love someone else. I have nurtured. I have destroyed. I have built towers taller than houses. I have been given a lot. I have had a lot taken from me. I have been the center of attention. I have been shunned. I have cracked under pressure. I have prevailed under worse. I have been tired. I have spoken to strangers. I have been robbed. I have had my self-worth broken down to nothing And then built up again to be stronger. I have done the same for others. I have watched as my mind slowly drifts away, Only to grab hold of it at the last minute. I have pushed my mind and body to the limit several times. I have done evil things, of these i am not proud. I have people I care for. I have people who care for me. I have made friends. I have been alone. I have laughed. I have cried. I have lived I have, Because I am.

Ranger 21-Sep-06/10:35 AM
Well okay, the poet has two categories of experience, and emphasises the unusual more than the usual. Fair enough, and rightly so. But this is a poem - and therefore it needs to be presented in an effective way. It made little impact on me and, it appears, little impact on the first two readers as well. I like the message, I think it needs to be said as often as possible, but my gripe is that it's been said in a way which left no impression on me (remember, this is simply my view - not a universal by any means). I believe this could have been done better, and I think if the poet wants to experiment with it, he/she will find that it achieves different reactions.

It's about the poet's perspective? That's debatable. After all, any text can be interpreted in a multitude of ways - the longer the piece, the more variations in interpretation (see Empson's rather compelling interpretation of Paradise Lost). Once a piece of literature leaves the author's quill it becomes public property. Any interpretation which logically and consistently holds up must be valid. What authority does the author have to say how a text should or should not be read?

--am I right in thinking that the quote means that people produce better work when praised rather than criticised? I'm not sure I agree with it...I probably sound like an argumentative sod, believe me that I'm just interested to find out other peoples' views :-)




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001