Ranger17 Jul 2006

This is good but I'd have preferred it if either it had been written freely without constraining yourself to the 4-line stanzas - something like:

Daring to speak, the house groans
Memories of past battles
The trees in the field, brushed aside
Cowed by screams of anger...

...or retain the stanzas but make it rhyme, Kipling-style. Then it would be superb, because you've got the content almost spot on. Just a few less words in places, not that I'm in a position to complain about people being wordy ;-)