Sunny20 May 2006

I found this to be a very clean piece, although I am one of 'those' who doesn't really care for caps w/ each new line, but I can still look past this of course. I like circles. I like circular stories...so is life, isn't it?!

My own personal notes:
-L2S1: I think starting out the line with "For" is unnecessary & reads awkwardly
-The play again & again of humility such as bringing up the van they were in repeatedly & such word usage as "...the best little farm..." is very nicely played on
-This is a "growth poem" per say - I liked that
-Didn't like how the "forest HEATED her home"...just didn't click w/ me
-Don't feel SHE needs to be screamed out in all caps. I don't feel that way in any instance in poetry however, just me.
-Good ending. Sharp & unpredictable, reading line by line

~Sunny