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Invasion (Free verse) by Roisin

A lead marble blocks my gullet, My floundering heart makes me sick. My mouth, no longer my own, corners hang on hooks; I'm exhausted by the irritation. I'm sorry I speak in contradictions and push you away for not sitting close, fester and throw accusations and try to call an end to something which exists independently. Objectively I watch this incongruent imposter, cringing at the fool, trying to remain faithful to a forgotten friend.

Niphredil 1-May-06/3:04 PM
On the contrary, I thought 'push you away for not sitting close' was extremely clear. He's speaking in contradictions. It don't get much more contradictory than that.

I didn't care for 'an enemy has permeated my mind', since in this line you're stating specifically what you succeeded in hinting at - quite well, in my opinion - throughout the entire poem. That aside, I thought it was a well-built and powerful poem; and I understood and identified with it, which is one of the trademarks of a good piece of work.




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