Replying to a comment on:

Murder Phoenix Born (meta-villanelle) (Villanelle) by Ranger

Pitched around inside this whirling fayre Quill-scratch scream - swift dart from lava flow A fallen leaf turns often in the air Thought of glory's talons in his hair Instead - a rosy skull, a cap of woe Pitched around inside this whirling fayre Across the burning hills he cried 'Beware The flash of early column light', as though A fallen leaf turns often in the air This small bird was cremated there Smoke-dawn lark encircled by grim crows Pitched around inside this whirling fayre There gathered flocks of ashes never shared Which would scatter like a broken stone A fallen leaf turns often in the air Quiet offer of a simple prayer Arrow feathered, hewn from speckled bone Pitched around inside this whirling fayre A fallen leaf turns often in the air

Ranger 18-Apr-06/2:59 PM
Well, basically, this poem was meant for a very close reading. Maybe not Derrida, but approaching that level. I don't expect people to see everything I've put in here, but then again I expect there to be other readings of it which I've missed (Imp's already given one). The primary intention is to get a poem which reads well on the surface. You got that reading straight away, so the poem is successful (as long as it's enjoyable to read, of course). I am, on the other hand, interested to see what interpretations other people give this (and others of mine). If the ideas that I've consciously included come across, then the poem's even more of a triumph. If not, then I have to decide whether I can write them more clearly without disturbing the surface poetry.
Thank you for commenting though (on this, and everything else). Getting a variety of thoughts is pretty much essential if I want to write universal poems.
'In Ethel's Honor' was a top poem, by the way.




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