Replying to a comment on:

no title (Other) by mystic enoch

The wind blows right through me as if I'm not really here. It has a chill to it. Like death is near. Free me from the world that I linger in it does not want me. Daydreams are my only friends. Its hard not to get lost in them. Every breath is a labor. Each sunrise seals my fate. These days drag on for too long. My heart is like a heavy weight. I lie in the shadows watching life go by. Longing for the day that I will finally die.

pollywolly 10-Mar-06/11:24 AM
i like the wording used here and the fitting subject. think if you broke it down a bit into a more sympathetic structure it would flow better and be a far better read. nice work.




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001