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On Looking Back (Limerick) by Dovina

I once had a friend in black, Who felt a twinge in his back. With blood on my knife, He fled for his life, So we never quite got in the sack.

Dovina 23-Feb-06/10:58 AM
The meter may be sweeter to the ear, but the meaning is lost. He was not "all" in black, just mostly. And to say that was "his" blood on my knife either tells the reader way more than I want to, or it is worng.

Yes, meter is good, but meaning is better.




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