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Mandarin Trial (Free verse) by cyan9

I awoke from my slumber to the warmth of day. Sunlight scattered 2D planes like glass panes through the room, Cutting through to illuminate fragments of stars in the dust. I lent forward and started to open the curtains, Time stood still and after minutes within a split second A irridescent wave of serotonin charged light burst through me. I lay back into the sheets to curtail the rushes, I lay back into the sheets, helpless to the bliss Helpless, and paralysed in pleasure beyond all limits. Powerless and limp to this Elysian outburst I began my descent back into the pillows Deeper down into my sleep within this world. With jolting limb I awoke again into the warmth of day, Sunlight scattered this time in celestial patterns, Stars rebounded and I lay perplexed & confounded. I fell back through the duvet, back through the mattress Back into another world between the seems, Panicked and begging to know of what fate awaited me. Into a sunlit glade I was released. Shards of light ricocheted off every tree, Dew trickled down from forever green leaves, I lay there, alive and paralysed within

cyan9 10-Nov-05/6:01 AM
Perhaps the repetition of sheets could go, but I like the rhyme to it, the problem is that I altered the first stanza that rhymed with this in order to improve the description, but now they are more seperated as a result. For me it is the 4th stanza that seems most out of place. I would welcome any ideas on how to integrate this.




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