Poemranker [Replying] Sun May 05 07:20:43 PDT 2024

Replying to a comment on:

There is a journey tree (Free verse) by ALChemy

There is a journey tree that stands amidst a river at the brink of a waterfalls that ends in a sea of fire It is the last resort for those caught by the stream Despite the rivers rage its strength will never wane Two birds around it circle One pigeon and one dove and as they pass each other the birds exchange a feather Its leaves are crystalline their colors ever changing and forever it shall stand for what it stands for is forever

zodiac

17-Oct-05/12:05 PM

You can stand in the middle of something. You can't stand in amidst it.

There is a journey tree
Standing in a wide river
Where a waterfall crests
Into a sea of fire

- is the easiest thing I can think of.

Pigeons and doves are the same species. Most "doves" released at dove-releasings are really trained homing pigeons.

I was just using someone else's "hypothetical". Unfortunately, it was Dovina's. You're wrong thinking hypothetical implies a "realistic" situation. Recently on poemranker we've had hypothetical worlds where, among other things
- humans evolved with hairy asses,
- I'm not wearing pants, and
- people communicate using only lies.

An image like your tree is nice for a color-by-numbers painting over the TV, the kind usually depicting lighthouses standing against the storm, or rainstorms looming over a small Alpine cottage. If you mean it to be a story, or poem, or story-poem, or poem-story, I think you need it to do something. I also think that'll be really hard to do. People who try tend to do one or more of the following things:
- Be walking along full of doubt and find the tree,
- Be swept along in the river and grab the tree,
- Remember the tree from youth and return to find it gone,
- Be Samuel T. Coleridge and zonked on Mexican brown.

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