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orange crumble (Free verse) by impert&ent

rough surfaces brick meets mortar brushed with moss bricks spall and crumble mortar falls away black gaps mark the separation grey orange green and black the colours of a wall

LilMsLadyPoet 26-Aug-05/4:21 PM
spall? typo? (spill, fall?) made up word? new word I have somehow managed to miss? gap in my vocabulary? What of this wall?...you described it, now I wonder about it...perhaps you could add to this, make it more than just a description. Does this wall match how you feel? How the area feels? Dark and crumbling? Is it decaying while everything else around it is newly built and valued? Is there a contrast you can include, to make this wall interesting? Does is separate you from something, does it line something, does it hold up something of worth, or left to decay as if it is nothing, when it is in fact something? As it stands, it just stands and does not garner much if any attention. I need more than this if I am to take notice of this wall of yours.




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