Replying to a comment on:

-750,000 in Rwanda (Free verse) by ALChemy

See how the Tutsi sleep dead in heaps and still they lie there where they die. Too many for the census takers, calculators, estimators. Too many for the senses to take. Hear our silence serenade the merciless raid. The order's called. The triggers pulled. The flash, the bang, the flesh explodes. and in the air the smell still hangs of a rotting sweetness in churches and streets. wreaking our futures bleakness Touch the ground unsettled ground desecration abound There are more bodies than bullet shells stabbing children snapping thier necks. Save the bullets for mom and dad. Kids are easier to kill.

zodiac 30-Jun-05/3:32 AM
Aren't you the hero? Oh, no, wait. You're not. Calling somebody who bothered to criticize your poem a "sadistic fuck" was pretty fucking heroic, though.

Regarding, "This poem for good or bad reasons has at least got you thinking about Rwanda again" - well, excuse my French, but that's kind of a load of crap. If you'd only posted the word "Rwanda" and nothing else, it would have gotten me thinking about Rwanda again, so what's the point of the other thirty lines. As far as your assumption that no poem can get close to the experience of Rwanda so it's a bum criticism to say your poem didn't, well that's kind of crap too. At least, a lot of things can get a lot closer than you've gotten. I'm not trying to say you're crap as a poet or anything such. I'd just like to suggest that you try to make your poems more evocative. And, considering our earlier conversation on this poem, true as well. Ask yourself, Even though I'm just writing these poems for myself, don't I think it would be a lot nicer to write good poems for myself than bad poems for myself? Then ask yourself, And isn't it probably the case that I'm just pissed because nobody thought my poem was genius and that's why I'm acting like this?




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