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A Righteous Prayer (Free verse) by Dovina

Oh, God, Whom I enthrone Because You meet my needs Grant now my petitions For which I make claim I bring humbly before You All those lofty ideals I’ve kept With passion for religion As tools for advancement As Your Word admonishes I now beseech Not in prayer demanding But in humble knowing I ask in faith, believing Rejecting the hypocrites Who say with their platitudes You’ve outlived usefulness I shall not shrink from asking With a righteous heart From One who gives to those In whom He delights Amen

Dovina 24-Jun-05/9:14 AM
I think the grammar issue goes back to our disagreement on punctuation. I omit commas at the ends of lines, thinking a pause is inferred there, where you say they are needed. See how these sentences look grammically when the inferred commas are added.

"Grant now my petitions, for which I make claim."
"I bring humbly before You all those lofty ideals I’ve kept, with passion for religion, as tools for advancement."
"As Your Word admonishes, I now beseech, ..."

Granted, the grammar is a bit awkward for prose, but for poetry, I think it's acceptable.




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