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To Making Do (Free verse) by Dovina

I gave her my life in little pieces, of working long and sleeping little, of wife and lovers come and gone, humble living and late-night typing. For this she gave her simple life at home to work unfettered. A mid-aged woman who loved just once, many years ago, no kids to tend. "I do what I must to stay afloat," I said. My life has come to getting by. Where love and music once filled my nights, I have a room and eat from cans." "I mix avocation and vocation," she replied. "Only employment is hard; work is not. At home with computer alone, I've chosen to blend my work and play." "This is a pleasant life you've found," I mused. "Free from creditors and ex's, free from ghosts of lovers past, free to play with lonely time."

DoubleU 19-May-05/8:10 PM
I meant in terms of structure. (Old-fashioned) poetry is balanced poetry, it has a rhythm. Reading it should give you the feeling that you are swept away in a dance. Not necessarily a romantic waltz! To me the perfect poem is the poem that blends traditional form with experimentalism. You more or less did such in your poem because stanza's 3-4-5 leave the harmonious form and turn into a report of an almost casual talk between two people. But it's the casual conversation that does not appeal to me.

I'm not at my very best right now, sorry if I ramble.




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