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Malice In Wonderland (edited) (Free verse) by Caducus

When Alice grew up she fell through darkness searching for Wonderland. Trembling she saw her life mirrored in a sea of scolding tea. Vessels of her childhood fell Landing as a wreck Next to a dead white rabbit by its broken clock-watch. The Cheshire cat appeared Grinning with decayed teeth At children garrotted by ribbons choking as they fell with Alice. The Queen of hearts waited for her to land stripped Alice naked, watched her guilt rape seeded skin Then ripped her heart out, watching its last beat fade with her blue eyes as death cards chanted 'long live the Queen'.

DoubleU 17-May-05/4:55 PM
It needs courage to take Carroll's story a step further. And here's the problem: you didn't. Your version turns a disturbing dream into a rather vulgar nightmare and in the process misses out on the fine-tuned philosophical jokes and nonsensicals of the original. This poem's like one of those MAD-parodies on movies but without the tong-in-cheekness. (And the MAD-parodies weren't subtile to begin with) So the poem has very little to do with Alice in Wonderland.
This could work, I think, if you strip (no, not that) Alice from her innocence and let all inhabitants of Wonderland stay the way as Carroll created them.
Let HER confuse/terrorize THEM.




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