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believing (Free verse) by whispern_smoke_wisp

If all it takes for fairies to be real, is you and I saying aloud that we believe in fairies. Then perhaps, the same method will work on God. Please, all of you, say it loudly with me. Let's all agree to belive in some sort of supreme power. Then perhaps we could give peace a chance.

zodiac 15-Apr-05/11:04 PM
You're probably wondering why you really got such low votes on this one. I'd say it's because you start with a bad assumption ("If all it takes for fairies to be real...") that no one really believes anyway, and then apply it in a kind of backwards way to God (since the fairies bit you copped from Peter Pan was CREATED TO BE a metaphor for childlike beliefs in general, especially belief in God), then you just kind of jump to the bumper-sticker bit at the end. Besides that one, sort of faulty, idea, there's nothing really to make this poetry, no originality of expression or imagery.

Please don't get me wrong. I like you and want to see you stick around and improve. Don't be offended.




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