Poemranker [Replying] Thu Nov 21 16:04:45 PST 2024

Replying to a comment on:

The Populous (Free verse) by durr_T_hip_E

they run from discontentment and beg for a quiet whispering disconnection in perfect form a water molecule splashing up from a rain puddle under a foot dirty sneakers indicative of experience grey long rain clouds patter necessity to the ground like babies lunging for their right to breathe peacefully dew drops are intently focused upon casual beauty of self a reflection of grasshoppers drowning in this sparkling moment the sidewalk lives less than a block away from any place where oceans collide with sunsets we are warmed here frictionless elements are connected by and by and severed ties remain as the only way to teach unity discontentment disconnects puddle drops from feet we are fleeting carriers

Goad

23-Mar-05/6:41 PM

Are you a real hippy, or one of the regulars posing as one?

-- a water molecule splashing up --
you mean 3 billion trillion, right?

do babies really patter necessity to the ground as they're lunging for their first breath? I actually have no idea when a baby is likely to take its first piss. Perhaps you're right.

--dew drops...grasshoppers drowning..
??? Wtf does that have to do with disaffectation? Are the dewdrops sentient, are they actually actively rolling around seeking out grasshoppers to drown in some metaphorical expression of the discontentment of the masses? The next image has even less to do with the pome. Admit it: the phrase "oceans collide with sunsets" came into your head and gave you a woody, and you've never had the self-discipline to say "this has nothing to do with the pome" and elide it.

How do frictionless elements get warmed? What does it mean for them to become warm? Then -- lets see if I've got this right -- connections develop between the frictionless elements, are then severed (by a severer who remains quite anonymous in the work) and the little severed floppy bits of the connections remain lying around to teach unity to the frictionless elements. What the fuck does that mean...is it, like, a metaphor?

What is it a metaphor FOR?

Please tell me one thing, because I confess as I reconstructed the imagery in my head I became quite curious about one detail...the remains of the severed connections that litter the space inhabited by the frictionless elements...do they sort of twitch and flop about? or do they teach us unity by lying quite deathly still? are they angry little writhing earthworms of severed empathy, or pale little gloworm ghosts of lost dreams of cameraderie?

So anyway, you were walking along in Seattle, stepped in a mudpuddle, caught a glimpse of a grasshopper & a dewdrop, experieneced a sudden moment of disassociation, in the clarity of which you noticed you share your general sense of discontentment with all the other schmucks walking around in the rain, shook it off and walked on with a fleeting sense of mortality and a renewed commitment to your own affectation of alienation.

well, good luck with your colliding sunsets and keeping your frictionless elements warm.

peace,

Goad

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