Sometimes I wonder how it is that I live with myself with what I know to be my selfishness and my greed I wonder why I'm not doing more for society why I sit back and enjoy myself knowing that others are suffering I wonder why I'm not doing more to enlighten my neighbors not doing more to make my friends realize that nothing is as bad as it can be it's not easy giving back it's not easy striking the balance between enjoying what has been given to you and saving the world I know I am failing falling back to the ease I was born with, ignoring the insight that I have been granted ignoring my only known gift how many others grapple with these kinds of questions how many others stay up at night fretting over the fate of the world how many others? because all this would be so much easier if I werent alone how many others? because all this would be so much easier if I knew that I wasn't crazy but I probably am, it probably isn't a bad thing lonliness is most likely my sacrafice to society and I can see it, I can see myself a bitter unhappy genious misunderstood, frustrated, seeing things all else refuse to see I can see this and it scares me, I don't want that, so I wonder how commited I really am to this saving the world thing, so I wonder if all my compassion isn't just cold, empty and fake.