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Half Empty, Half Whole (Free verse) by Rainbow_chaser

Memories of times long past lay heavy on my soul, A life of utter loneliness slowly takes its toll. I hold a dream deep within, of a time when we will reunite, We have yet to meet in this life, But we will feel it at first sight. I call to you each night, Do you hear my calls?, do you hear me plead?, I yearn to fill the void, find completion you hold everything left that i need. Times are tough but i still hold dear, to the time when we shall meet, With you and I working as a team there is no challenge we cannot beat. Come to me my love, i ache to find a home im your embrace, Our hearts will become as one again When we come face to face. So until that day my love, I shall sit patiently and wait, For i want you and only you My other half, my soul mate ??Autumn Dawe

richa 9-Mar-05/2:44 AM
Don't be ridiculous. If you write to get rid of an emotional block (whatever overblown, melodramatic and ultimately meaningless buncombe that is) then when you have finished simply throw it in the bin. You have moved the emotional block and we all hear no more about it.

I understand that you haver managed to distil emotion to its purest form, ace. If I had read this poem without you telling me this I would have thought it was just another bumbling misappropriation of the English language. Now that you have used the magic words fibre, core and pure, I understand how wrong I would have been.

The reason weighing on the soul is wrong is because the soul is an abstract idea that you have made no attempt to get to grips with. You have merely said 'soul' which you believe is enough to evoke some kind of empathy for your deep suffering. It isn't.

By the way 'writters' is spelt 'writers'. The word you attempted is aptly enough as close to witters as writers.




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