Replying to a comment on:

Pinhole (Free verse) by Dovina

A small hole in the Venetian blind casts a shadow on the table of my finger about to press another lazy key. Silhouette in minute detail, fingerprint defined as washboard, Tiny hairs rendered as spider legs. No ordinary, fuzzy shadow here, as if the sun had lost its size. A dot it is, confined beside me. Constrained to a thin bright stream, A narrow sunbeam, casting edges of a finger in its path. If only I could reduce the light, squeeze the largeness of the orb, and cast an image so precise upon this cluttered screen. I don’t need a mass of sunny light to reveal the thing and make it clear, just a well placed pinhole in a Venetian blind.

-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 19-Dec-04/6:26 AM
This borders on dangerously wacky. I recommend the guideline, "If Terry Pratchett could have written it, it's guss." Still, a good effort, especially the second verse of the lay. 7/10.




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001