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A Kiss Beneath The Blossom Tree (Free verse) by Caducus

My father tended lovingly to his garden Mowing symmetrically He lowered his head Bowing like a cumbersome tulip. Sweat jewelled his brow Then sailed through his wrinkles Leaving tracks which glittered Like bark on the birch tree. He climbed the tree for apples Then suddenly grasped his wrist, He looked at Mum and said ‘Sorry Dear’ Falling down upon the trellis. The blossom fell like soft rain, And beneath the tree my Mum kissed him Saying ‘here we are again my love’. When his parents were alive He was raised by dead authors. Prayers were said with one eye open For God was a willow cane And worship was forced till fingertips blackened Crying for Mr Tumnus in a locked wardrobe He never felt the snow on his feet Just row upon row of God’s cloth Which reeked of bourbon and incesnse. His fathers wrath remained In my fathers limp, and loving words. His solace was the hills And met my Mother there She showed him flowers and hollowed trees And they kissed beneath Apple blossom. Today I took my lover To ‘Crackly Woods’ where they met Carved their names in to an apple tree And kissed her lips on the ashes of blossom, Where my mother and father now rest forever.

Tintagiles 24-Sep-04/5:39 PM
For some reason I can't bring myself to think the last stanza fits. Though I love the 'Kissed her lips on the ashes of blossom'. For some reason it doesn't seem to work rhythmically. Also, while the whole wheel of time moving around, as was done before so shall be done again, etc theme works (i.e. you kissing your lover where your parents kissed etc.), it seems a touch clichéd. It makes me think too much of 'Songs my Mother Taught Me' in that respect.

There's also the fact that I sort of would have liked it if you'd found a way of ending it without bringing yourself into play. 8 for now because I'm a miserable shite and the score's high enough as it is already.




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