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cold sonnet (Sonnet) by <~>

Cedars breathe, slower than the grasses but not so slow as stones. Paled, the verdance of their scratching splits short days, cracks bones. With wails whispered half gone, colorless wind catches avian darts in current, hurling winged survivors into blues gone white, ochres greyed; in piney hearts and bared burls they find frozen comfort for the night. There is shelter here, in marooned evergreen a deepened slumber, a breaking dream where iced veins thicken, strain, and woody muscles burn, entrain the rhythm of a soiled heart: waiting, watching is their part. (edit 8/21/02)

god'swife 21-Aug-02/12:46 PM
Tree and stone. Do you believe in coincidence? Wow so do I!!! Thank you for your praise. I love your poem, but it seems to be bogged down with fancy synonyms. You've got great skill, which can't be taught. Speak from the heart instead of the head. Concentrate or actually stay unfocused enough to go with sound of words working together. Your 1st and 3rd lines are beautiful examples of this. the vowel sounds in cedars breathe are sensual and strong. Also the rhymn between slow as stones & craked bones. Needs work. Give it time.




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