nentwined16 May 2004

The rhythm does seem a bit off, but villanelles are like that even when they're spot on, I think. You use some very simple rhymes, perhaps ironically, but that doesn't make them hurt less. I like the two lines you've used to repeat, and I really like that you alternate the leading. Negative points (in my book) for anything that asks for the context of poemranker. But. Dunno. For the form, and for what you're saying, I think you've done a decent job. Bonus for giving me fat to chew. This'll sit in my favorites for a bit regardless.