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Into My World (Acrostic) by sliver

Rosebuds seem pale in your presence even when wet with my tears no such beauty before or since ever came close-that's clear even Snow White would pale in your mirror. Beautiful down to the core light in the darkest night uncharted regions waiting to be explored everything about you feels right Emotions swell when you're near yearning to be unfurled everyone else seems to disappear since you've come into my world.

avery 6-Sep-04/9:18 AM
Renee Blue Eyes. It's simple yet i fell that the words used were adequate in this instance. I think i particularly liked the first two and the last two lines. Well written, an acrostic that evokes emotion. But next time round, maybe you would like to stress upon certain lines. Good Work, an 8 over 10. And i did another one, review if you have the time.




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